Tag Archives: relationships

The Circle of Life

Kahin To Yeh Dil Kabhi Mil Nahin Paate
Kahin Pe Nikal Aaye Janmon Ke Naate
Ghani Thi Uljhan Bairi Apna Man
Apna Hi Hoke Sahe Dard Paraye

Kabhi Yun Hi Jab Hui Bojhal Saansen
Bhar Aai Baithe Baithe Jab Yoon Hi Aankhen
Kabhi Machal Ke Pyaar Se Chal Ke
Chhuye Koi Mujhe Par Nazar Na Aaye

Kahin Door Jab Din Dhal Jaye
Sanjh Ki Dulhan Badan Churaye, Chupke Se Aaye
Mere Khayalon Ke Aangan Mein
Koi Sapnon Ke Deep Jalaye

The bridge glows like a jewel in the dark in front of me. Many a time I had crossed it earlier without knowing what a spectacular view it provided to the casual onlooker from a distance against the dark sky and the wide expanse of the bay spread out like a black satin sheet at this time of the night.

When you’re on a bridge you rarely know what crossings overs look like.

Yet, jewel the bridge is not. The hard, glittering, diamond-like effect against the night sky is not static. The light is softened by a dynamism that makes it come alive. Continue reading The Circle of Life

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Are relationships becoming shallower online?

If you’re reading my post you’re a denizen of the online world just like me. C’mon, there’s no denying it. [insert smiley face here]

We’re all here. There are those of us who are writing things online. Others are reading us. Many of us spend hours on social media connecting and reconnecting with friends. Yet others spend time here learning, informing themselves, mis-informing themselves, finding partners, finding their way, playing games, snooping on people and doing pretty much most of the functions we could perform in the good ol’ real world.
Continue reading Are relationships becoming shallower online?

Social media and characters

I’ve been overcome by a sense of wonder lately at how different people can be, well, different.  A newer shade of awe regarding the diversity of human character has deepened this feeling more recently because of the changes in our social topography thanks to social media.

How many different ways have now emerged to get to know people from different angles! How many more ways to  gain access to their deepest selves, to the inner workings of their minds and to their momentary thoughts and feelings and to the general trends of their character!

Deziple Character
Deziple Character (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

A few days ago, for example, I wrote a post  in which I wondered why people might feel the need to put up pictures on their walls and what it might say about them. At some point a few days later, it was very late at night and I was just browsing my blog  when an orange notification of a comment popped up. Someone had commented!

In the comment the reader said something that never would have occurred to me. Whenever he sees a picture, he wants to put himself in it. Or rather, he only hangs pictures that he can imagine himself in. He meant that he only puts up things that resonates with him (not that he is a self-obsessed narcissist, of course!)

It was just a casual comment but it got me thinking. Continue reading Social media and characters

Facebook, love, and fiction

You are in love with this girl that you’ve been tracking for a while on Facebook. You may or may not have met her in person. You know what she likes, what she dislikes (or at least what she thinks she likes or dislikes), where she’s from, who her best friends are who regularly talk to her, where she went for a hike this weekend, even where she is right now, at this very moment.

Holding hands.

You know her like you’ve never known anyone before. Like from the inside of her head. You know her far better than your roommate that you eat and watch TV with everyday.

You know how her thoughts waver, how she is indecisive, how she sometimes posts a link and deletes it immediately, how she changes the wording on her status updates because she is rather shy and doesn’t want to appear too bold with sensational things.

There’s a dreamy quality about her that you like for she often makes the backgrounds of her pictures fuzzy keeping the focus only on herself and her friends who are always smiling, frozen in time. Continue reading Facebook, love, and fiction

Ode to failure

What does it mean  to lag behind, to loiter, to delay, to be undecided, to lack a goal? To fail, to fall, to get lost, to wander? To not be perfect, to not match exactly, to not fit a plan, to not fulfil the scheme, to not be of value, in short, to not be successful? Continue reading Ode to failure

The Ex-Files: Ex Boyfriends and Girlfriends from the Twilight Zone

The Ex archives and the archiving process–the meaning of storing, filing, classifying and communicating about exes and the final, ceremonial, cathartic exorcism. That could be a good subject of contemplation today.

Why do we keep returning to the Ex-Files in life and literature over and over? Continue reading The Ex-Files: Ex Boyfriends and Girlfriends from the Twilight Zone

Dinner and a movie– alone!

Have you ever tried to tell someone that you had an engagement Friday night?

“What are you doing tomorrow night?”
“I’m going out for dinner and a movie.”
“Who’s going?”
By that, they mean who’s going with you?
Try saying “Me.””Myself.” “I.”

Look of incomprehension. Then understanding. Then pity. Then the inevitable desire to “reach out.”
“We’re going bowling. Come with us!”

Why is it so difficult to understand that it might be possible to enjoy one’s own company?
Why can’t a person go for a dinner and a movie by themselves? Continue reading Dinner and a movie– alone!

It’s a dog’s life

English: Pencil Drawing

It’s a beautiful day and I’ve been at my window watching dogs pass by with their owners. Now, I live in a place where there is very little dirt and the concrete, on sunny days, it glows like a clean white plate right out of the dishwasher. Not a crack, not a speck of yesterday’s dirt. The water of the river is blue and the ships, they look perfectly painted.

There are so many dogs! The dogs here, like the people, have an attitude. Continue reading It’s a dog’s life

Facebook and Friendships

Friendship

In the last few years, something has changed about my understanding of friendships. Before Facebook, I had sort of assumed what a friend was, what friendship meant, and how I myself interacted with friends.

But in a strange way, contrary to a simple idea that Facebook makes me realize the difference between “true” and “false” friends, people I actually know in “real” life vs. people I have barely met or not met at all, my notion of the idea of friendship itself has changed. Continue reading Facebook and Friendships

How to date a Geek

Being from a fairly removed species somewhat alien to Geekdom and the Geek life, I was completely clueless as to how to interact with the Geek species of humans. But having spent more than my share of time in the natural habitats of Geeks for the last few years as a non-Geek, I’ve had the opportunity to closely observe, interact, feed (yes, they like all cuisines!) and even friend a fair number.

This has been hard work but unexpectedly rewarding.

List of The Big Bang Theory episodes (season 4)

After being indoors several evenings watching countless reruns of The Big Bang Theory and more than my share of a certain shaggy haired character in the habit of repeating “Oh the aliens did it!” “The aliens did it!” on the History channel (with an especially geeky one of the species), I was very pleasantly surprised to see that Geeks are, in fact, an extremely endearing species who are really very likeable once you get to know them, sort of like a Hippogriff from Harry Potter. Continue reading How to date a Geek

How to date a non-geek woman: Advice to Geek men

Since my rather sociological observation on Geek dating habits last week, I realized that a need exists in the world regarding more research on this topic. A brief review of existing literature to augment my (erstwhile) ideas to supplement my first-hand experience observing Geeks in Geekdom, from the disinterested perspective of a non-geek, revealed a misdirected focus in said critical analysis of this highly misunderstood and somewhat neglected species.
Line art drawing of spectacles. Suomi: Piirust... Moreover, a few brave voices from Geekdom (in the form of comments and other indicators) that were able to rise above the clamour and noise of long preserved stereotypes, on both sides, to reach the Geek researcher’s ivory tower compelled me to think about the following question:

Even if the common woman (oops, didn’t mean that kind of common woman) did reach out to the Geek, how would the Geek, the semi Geek, the uber Geek, and the ultra Geek not manage to chase her away? What pearls of wisdom can I share to bring about mutual intelligibility?
Continue reading How to date a non-geek woman: Advice to Geek men